y0lk: household uses for afghanistanian food
ive always held a special place for afghanistanian food in my heart. not many
know about it, but afghanistans have a special talent for multi-purpose edible
devices.
hi, im stain. you may remember me as that guy that calls teleconferences and
mumbles to himself, or asks for your voice number on ice. i now present to
you my textual documentary of afghanistanian food.
hello, als afghan restaurant, may i help you?
hi, do you sell yarn?
yarn?
ja, do you sell yarn?
im sorry sir, we sell afghanistanian food here. no yarn.
WHAT?! YOU SELL AFGHAN FOOD AND YOU NO SELL YARN?!! I KILL YOU!!! YOU NOT
KNOW HOW AFGHANISTANIAN FOOD GOES WITH YARN?!? THEY GO TOGETHER LIKE PEANUT
BUTTER AND POTATO! WHY YOU NO SELL YARN?!
Im sorry, sir. No yarn here.
MARGARITA, THESE RAT BASTIDS NO SELL YARN!!!
crazed immigrant gives phone to insane hispanic wife
tonto gringo estupido! no puedo ir a la fiesta! las pantalones son
demisiante largos, y nadie tiene tiempo para acortarlos! domingo, domingo,
domingo! el autobus es muy muy rapido! tu no tienes YARN?!
click
whee. that was a phone conversation i had earlier this year. i think maybe i
had too many flintstones vitamins. those r0ol.
anyway, this is knowledge that i had to spread. i didnt even think there was
such a thing as afghanistanian food... look in your phonebook, youll probably
find one or two afghanistanian restaurants... i bet this conversation would be
pretty cool recreated on a teleconference.
by the way, the guy called back five minutes later. heres the conversation we
had:
excuse me, sir... someone just prank-called my restaurant.
WHAT? IT BETTER NOT BE MY BOY, OR HES GETTING THE BEATING OF HIS LIFETIME!!
from across my hall AAH! NO!! DAD!!! DIE! DIE! DIE!
click
h0ot.
if youre ever doing this on a conf, you better gimme the damn info. beats the
hell out of taco bell pranks.
why do cool radio stations play melissa etheridge and neil young? does anyone
really like them?
woo! im in da car right now... theres a forest fire... carnage! yay!
vmb nonsense:
stop calling my vmb and hanging up, cidica... epidemic... i dont care how
hilarious my vmb message is... its a pain in the ass, fooze!
someone called today... this message isnt really funny, just confusing:
hey dave, this is... uhm, yeah... call me at 000000-0000
uhh... dude, id like to call you, but im not about to dial your house and say
hello, is... uhm, yeah... there?
that would be nutty.
well, the real purpose of this issue was just to mention that great phone
conversation with the afghan, but i didnt wanna make it too short... i think
ill conclude now.
editors note: who cares what i think about myself anyway? do people even
read these editors notes?
index of y0lk issues:
issue . title
1 the other white meat
2 several k-rad elite haxors sitting around a campfire and grooving
3 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars.
4 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin
. 5 , household uses for afghanistanian food ,
all issues by stain so far
ive always held a special place for afghanistanian food in my heart. not many
know about it, but afghanistans have a special talent for multi-purpose edible
devices.
hi, im stain. you may remember me as that guy that calls teleconferences and
mumbles to himself, or asks for your voice number on ice. i now present to
you my textual documentary of afghanistanian food.
hello, als afghan restaurant, may i help you?
hi, do you sell yarn?
yarn?
ja, do you sell yarn?
im sorry sir, we sell afghanistanian food here. no yarn.
WHAT?! YOU SELL AFGHAN FOOD AND YOU NO SELL YARN?!! I KILL YOU!!! YOU NOT
KNOW HOW AFGHANISTANIAN FOOD GOES WITH YARN?!? THEY GO TOGETHER LIKE PEANUT
BUTTER AND POTATO! WHY YOU NO SELL YARN?!
Im sorry, sir. No yarn here.
MARGARITA, THESE RAT BASTIDS NO SELL YARN!!!
crazed immigrant gives phone to insane hispanic wife
tonto gringo estupido! no puedo ir a la fiesta! las pantalones son
demisiante largos, y nadie tiene tiempo para acortarlos! domingo, domingo,
domingo! el autobus es muy muy rapido! tu no tienes YARN?!
click
whee. that was a phone conversation i had earlier this year. i think maybe i
had too many flintstones vitamins. those r0ol.
anyway, this is knowledge that i had to spread. i didnt even think there was
such a thing as afghanistanian food... look in your phonebook, youll probably
find one or two afghanistanian restaurants... i bet this conversation would be
pretty cool recreated on a teleconference.
by the way, the guy called back five minutes later. heres the conversation we
had:
excuse me, sir... someone just prank-called my restaurant.
WHAT? IT BETTER NOT BE MY BOY, OR HES GETTING THE BEATING OF HIS LIFETIME!!
from across my hall AAH! NO!! DAD!!! DIE! DIE! DIE!
click
h0ot.
if youre ever doing this on a conf, you better gimme the damn info. beats the
hell out of taco bell pranks.
why do cool radio stations play melissa etheridge and neil young? does anyone
really like them?
woo! im in da car right now... theres a forest fire... carnage! yay!
vmb nonsense:
stop calling my vmb and hanging up, cidica... epidemic... i dont care how
hilarious my vmb message is... its a pain in the ass, fooze!
someone called today... this message isnt really funny, just confusing:
hey dave, this is... uhm, yeah... call me at 000000-0000
uhh... dude, id like to call you, but im not about to dial your house and say
hello, is... uhm, yeah... there?
that would be nutty.
well, the real purpose of this issue was just to mention that great phone
conversation with the afghan, but i didnt wanna make it too short... i think
ill conclude now.
editors note: who cares what i think about myself anyway? do people even
read these editors notes?
index of y0lk issues:
issue . title
1 the other white meat
2 several k-rad elite haxors sitting around a campfire and grooving
3 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars.
4 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin
. 5 , household uses for afghanistanian food ,
all issues by stain so far
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