*--* 01-20-97 - 17:29:59 *--* A date: 9:07 am Mon Jan 20, 1997 number : 1 of 5 from: Neophyte@Bbs.Dsoe.Com (1:2401/30 base : Private Mail to : Warpus (1:2401/8001) refer #: None subj: hi there replies: None stat: normal netmail origin : 20 Jan 97 03:53:50 7:02:46 EST5 multiboard.com (8.7.5.2/8.6.12) with ESMTP id GAA30639 for ; Mon, 20 Jan 1997 06:51:03 -0500 y aphex.direct.ca (8.8.3/8.8.0) with SMTP id DAA13234 for ; Mon, 20 Jan 1997 03:52:14 -0800 (PST) Date: Mon, 20 Jan 1997 03:53:50 -0800 From: neophyte This is a multi-part message in MIME format. --------------2CCE28B72697 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit i downloaded netscape 3.01 gold so i can finally attach my work for blender #9 to email. continue?(y/n):                 zooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmm --------------2CCE28B72697 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii; name="YT-HULK.TXT" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Content-Disposition: inline; filename="YT-HULK.TXT" "i don't believe it! he threw him right out of the ring! this is proposterous!" He sat down, lit up a cigarette (even though he didn't smoke), and began to ponder what would become of his future. Hulk Hogan turned the t.v. off because he couldn't bear to watch "Sports Review" one more time. He poured himself a nice, big drink and stared at the ceiling. There was a knock. This time it wasn't opportunity, but it was a knock at his door. It wasn't the opportunity to kick Pee-Wee Herman's ass in the ring, like he had failed to do so earlier that day. Hulk put his drink down, got up and answered the door. Suddenly about fifteen reporters came out of nowhere and started to get in his face. They were all asking about the fight, and how he was taking the defeat in which he received from the newly dubbed WWF Champion, Pee-Wee Herman. Hulk closed the door and nearly broke the nose of one of the reporters who was leaning in too close. He sat back down, took down his drink, and put continue?(y/n):                 his face in his hands and began to cry. He cried for a few minutes, then went into the washroom because he had a headache. He opened up the medicine cabinet to find his Tylenol, but suddenly a loaded revolver fell out of nowhere. "What the hell?" "It's a gun, you dingbat" "Wha.. hey who's there? What the..?" "It's me." "you-" "yes. that's what i said, dingbat" "you, who?" "yoohoo!" "stop playing games, where is that voice coming from?" "i am god" continue?(y/n):                  "oh my god" "yes?" "huh?" "what?" "shut up! listen hulk, you have failed me. anyone who is pathetic enough to get his ass kicked by pee-wee herman deserves to die-" "it wasn't my fault! he uhh.. oh wait yeah it was my fault.." "good god.. oh wait that's me. jesus christ hu-.. oh can't say that either.. hmm err.. well anyways he kicked your ass so bad that he even had time to do his make-up all-over again, and then do a quickie on the crowd" "a quickie? what the hell are you talking about?" "you know... . don't you?" "no idea" continue?(y/n):                  "he pulled a shannon hoon.. on the crowd. you know the blind melon guy? .. well except with a different substance" "uhh.. WHAT?" "nevermind." "so what do you want?" "i want to let you know.. that YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA!!!!!!" "oh my god" "yes?" "STOP THAT!" Hulk ran out of the bathroom screaming. Then he stopped and thought to himself, "Hey.. what about the gun". "That was a fake gun" continue?(y/n):                  "what the.. how can you hear me?" "i have my ways" "are you those stupid candid camera guys? if i ever see dom deluise i'm going to kick his ass" "or at least pathetically attempt to. we've got pee-wee herman on our side". "well.. uhh.. shut up" "no you shut up" "err ok" Hulk picked up the gun and a tear formed in his err.. tear duct. The put the gun into his mouth and said, "Goodbye, cruel woRRLDMSFAKDLFL-" as he bit into the chocolate gun wrapped in foil. "AARRGHH!!! MY TEETHh!!!" continue?(y/n):                  "haha that's what you get" "who are you?" "i'm mr. foil" "mr. what??" "you heard me" "what?" "shut up" "what do you want?" "you know if you eat enough of that chocolate you'll die, but i wouldn't do it. it can be very painful" "errr... what are you trying to do, tempt me?" "yes" continue?(y/n):                  "oh... hmmm well ok bye" "bye" Hulk gobbled down the whole chocoalate bar and began to feel sick. Suddenly the sickness drifted away and he was left back to completely normal (his original headache still remaining). "want some more?" "more what?" "huh?" "what?" "shut up!" "more chocolate?" "yes" continue?(y/n):                  "sure. it's yummy in my tummy" "what?" "huh?" "shut up!" "grr... sure send some more down here, mr. foil" "mr. foil, what the hell are you talking about, this is god!" "god? oh ok.. well get mr. foil to send some more guns down here" A whole heap of at least 50 chocolate guns fell out of nowhere and landed on Hulk with a THUMP. "ouch" "yes?" "what?" continue?(y/n):                  "i'm mr. ouch" "go away, i never want to talk to you again" "why not?" "because uhh ... well.. i have to die now, so go away" "ok bye" Hulk managed to gobble down about 25 of them because he felt really bad.. he picked up one of the foil wrappers and looked at it. "Oh no! This is *HELL* brand name chocolate! oh no!" He began to get mass stomach cramps "warning: chocolate may cause mass stomach cramps..." a burning headache "... a burning headache..." continue?(y/n):                  his arm fell off "... loss of random limbs..." his mustach fell off in pieces "... loss of curly mustach that makes you look stupid anyways you stupid wimp" "hey, that wasn't on the wrapper" "of course not. i'm mr. insult" "oh i suppose you're going to inSULT me right?" "actually no, i came to bring you happy thoughts. kind of ironic eh?" "go away" "well fine be that way" "what?" continue?(y/n):                  "huh?" "ha! it's my turn! SHUT UP!" "fine. i'm leaving and i'm taking my ball with me" "what ball?" "that ball." "oh THAT ball. fine i never liked your stupid ball anyway" "good. i'm glad" With that, Hulk gobbled down another 50 guns. His other arm and a leg suddenly fell off and he went unconscious (or dead?). When he woke up, he felt a hot, burning sensation. He stood up, and saw a red demon before him. "yoooouuu muuuuust buuuuurnn fooooorrr eeeeterniiiityyyyyy" "why are you talking like that?" "i dunno.. for show.. anyways you must burn for eternity and stuff" continue?(y/n):                  "why?" "you lost to pee-wee herman, you idiot. what else" "oh yeah.. that" "so uhh.. doesn't the fire hurt or anything?" "not really" "WHAT?! DAMMIT GORP, TURN UP THE HEAT!" "ouch ok ok it hurts. don't get pissed or anything" "sorry we don't have alcohol down in hell" "why the HELL not?" "we don't have puns either, idiot. get back to work" continue?(y/n):                  "i was never working in the first place" "well.. uhh.. start working then" "ok.. err what am i working on again?" "DAMMIT i KNEW i forgot something.. ok.. you're working on an excessively long, pointless story which is to be submitted into blender #9 okay?" "i can do that" "you already have" "what?" "huh?" "who are you anyways?" "i'm the devil" "no you're not" continue?(y/n):                  "i am too" "show me your i.d." "here" (passes i.d. to hulk) "ok FINE you're the devil. shouldn't you be off doing devilish things or something?" "i am" "oh.. ok.. uhh well this story sucks so should we end it now?" "i guess so" "what?" "huh?" "shut up" ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- continue?(y/n):                  this idiotic attempt at humour has been brought to you by the one, the only NEOPHYTE of MISTIGRIS for BLENDER number NINE. i'll SHUT UP now. oh wait.. i usually draw ansi, but i write and i have an emag, so (here it comes, yes, a cheap plug) WRITEFOROMLETTEORI'LLKILLYOU neophyte@bbs.dsoe.com ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------2CCE28B72697-- Ä email/internet email Ä (?=help):