Mutt Are there common rules regarding ass scratching in someone elses
house?
nMANCEr Mutt: Well, you can scratch your ass, you just cant make it
obvious. Lean up against something.
Mutt nM: What if I lean against another person.. it that kosher?
nMANCEr Mutt: Only if youre invited to do so.
nMANCEr Mutt: Or, possibly, it could be a slip. OOPS! Sorry, slipped.
Mutt nM: What are the max number of furniture rubs youre allowed per
minute, so as not to be overly conspicuous?
nMANCEr Mutt: 10.
nMANCEr Anymore than that, and people will think you have a furniture fetish
or a bad case of fleas.
nMANCEr And its all in how you rub it, you know? I mean, if you go up to it
like a dog in heat and start pumping away, it really ruins the
purpose of the furniture booty scratch. You have to downplay the
whole thing.
Mutt So is there a number of stratches per minute, or does it just relate to
the number of people around..?
Mutt I mean..
Mutt right now nobody is around
nMANCEr Well, if youre alone, then you dont really need to employ the
furniture-scratch.
Mutt so Im using Kathys phone
Mutt and Im just MINING away
Mutt and its great
nMANCEr You might as well just do whatever it takes to get the job done, you
know?
nMANCEr Yeah, phones work well.
nMANCEr So do sporks.
nMANCEr But if there are people around, then subtlety is key.